Everyday that passes
The reactions are mixed
One day I
Can stand the look in the mirror
And smile back
On the other
I can’t stomach
Those empty eyes
String back at me
I would have 2 weeks
Every month where I can’t
Fake the joy and excitement anymore
Where I finally
Break into pieces
And yet I force myself to
Work without thinking
On those days my eye site
Blurs and the world around me
For a second is no more
I wish I could
Blur the lines in the my world
And forget who I am
So I could enjoy
The bless of not knowing
What got me to this day
Is that what death feels like
A blur of reality
And the forgetfulness of one’s own life
The doubts that brought me here
Are the same as before
Who am I
And why do I feel so much pain