Found out the reason for my sleep and digestion issues I been having for the past few days. Along with why i was gaining weight, even when I have been sticking to my diet. I haven’t been drinking enough water. The day before yesterday, or at least the extreme AM of yesterday, I looked up… Read More Health 068
I’m almost at my goal for the month of losing 5 lbs. I’m not trying to do a drastic weight loss. My aim to do it to where it’s easy to maintain. Starting weight for this month was 242.4. Current weight as of today is 237.8 lbs. That’s a 4.6 lbs difference. I’m very excited… Read More Health 067
Sometimes when I feel down on myself I look back on when I decided to become sober (alcohol). Which I’m reaching my 3rd year anniversary on May 9th. Because it puts into perspective how far I came. Such as in 2023 I reached my heaviest at 270 lbs. But with lots of hard work, as… Read More Health 062
Besides my perfectionism holding me back, I’m starting to think that my fear of injury is also making it difficult to make any progress in my health journey. Especially since I’m constantly convincing myself I’m not ready for something because I could get hurt if done wrong. It’s even more apparent since I’m doing this… Read More Health. Rant 042
What are your thoughts on the concept of living a very long life? What’s considered a long life? Just living to see the next day to me is living a long life because not many reach my age or older. Which makes me grateful and I want to fill everyday I’m consciously living with something… Read More
What is the greatest gift someone could give you? My plane ticket to travel from New York to Oregon. Besides that, small gifts my true friends given me out of pure kindness. Any gift from family came with conditions. So when getting something from my friends “just because” at first felt weird and uncomfortable, since… Read More Gift giving
Goal for 2025 is to stop being a perfectionist. From learning to not overthink the small details to giving myself the freedom to be the me when I used to be an alcoholic. The alcoholic me was free and just didn’t care. Was confident and just went for it. I want to be that without… Read More Trauma Recovery: 2025 Goals
I will not get over the fact that compared to my siblings I actually tried to follow the religion my family is apart of. From the morals to what a person is supposed to be. I said “tired”. Even when my family and have very different opinions on how to follow such principles, along with… Read More Trauma Recovery 005
It’s one of those things of I had a reached a decent point in many of my public profiles, but it was exhausting and I felt like a fake. And in my attempts to find myself again, I feel like I’m lacking something. Oh well, at least I’m trying and I’ll eventually get back to… Read More Trauma Recovery 004
Feeling good today. I started using weights again, but kept it light and on the floor. Best part is that I feel statified in the sense not really hungry or craving anything. Which is something I struggled during the time I couldn’t workout. It’s like, the urge to eat is practically gone. And I’m super… Read More Health 042
Xexiar 