I’m still shocked, embarrassed, and giggling at myself for admitting to my case manager my type. Shocked that I said it out loud. Embarrassed because the way I said it. Giggling over the whole situation.

She did comment how I’ll most likely meet my type in the gym. But I mentioned I rather meet them in wild.

I used how finding someone who happens to enjoy a drink or two out in public is more genuine compared to meeting said person in a bar. The drinking isn’t a personality trait, it’s just something they do.

So meeting my type in a gym doesn’t feel genuine. Even if we share similar hobbies and interests, doesn’t mean it’s our whole personality. At that, not everyone workout in a public gym. Some likes private gyms, others like at home gyms (like myself).

Hence why it’s another list of things I look forward to finding when I have my own car. While I have my adventures and hopefully make many friends along the way. There’s also the possibility of meeting a few partners, temporary and/or long term. But until then, gotta work on myself.

I want to physically embody my standards. Instead of just hoping someone else will do so. I want to be at the same level as my partner, the way I want my partner to be at my level.

Which is something that always pissed me off about all my exs. I always felt I was settling for whatever, even though they never reached my level. I thank my insecurities for causing me to just accept whatever. But as I improve myself, both physically and mentally, I hope I’ll be secure enough in who I am as a person that it’ll attract someone who’s on my level or higher.

I want someone who won’t just push me to be my best, but I also push them. I just want someone who’s at my pace at climbing this mountain we call life. Perhaps I’m asking too much, but same time doesn’t everyone wants someone on compliments who they are as a person?