The more in-depth I heal in therapy the more I’m trying to figure out things. I’m still defending my mom for all she’s done. Because I’m still excusing her for the emotional neglect and abuse. But same time I’m still stating how she’s a product of her own trauma and marriage dynamic. Yet, those small… Read More Father?
Sometimes I wonder if I should have that long conversation with my parents about me being male. And when I think about it I get angry. I get frustrated and just want to avoid the whole topic all together. Other times I feel it be pointless. Like I can already hear them respond. When I… Read More I’m Strong?
As I’m thinking about it doing HRT before the removal of certain body parts is a much safer way to go, for me at least. Instead of the shock my body would face when taking out the shining actors would be painful. To suddenly have an organ that produces ripped out without preparing the body… Read More Transitioning
So like I just realized something. My family have always been “you eat everything.” “You’re pretty much a vacuum for food.” But then get shocked when I don’t want to eat or don’t like certain foods. Then they would argue with me about it. both my sisters are always stating how I’m a bottomless pit… Read More Foods
As I’m cleaning my room a few thoughts keep crossing my mind. I’m practicing having a full argument over how I won’t get my work noticed because I don’t advertise enough. Or how I don’t ask for help when I need it. Let alone how I treat everyone around me. The more I thought on… Read More 9.23.2022
You ever get excited over something so small that you just want to share it with the world?Well I do! I got this part of the carpet clean without using a broom to do so. For the longest dealing with how the litter box and my makeshift bed was on the same level really effected… Read More Small Joys
Just had a thought. Maybe I don’t like hiking and the outdoors the way I thought I did. There can be a much deeper reason behind such desires. Like my longing, since childhood, of wanting to escape. The deep urge of running away from my family. That could be the reason I looked to nature… Read More Just maybe…
I had finally got down to writing the ending to a fanfic project, College Crush. It took me so long to figure out how I was going to end it. Mostly because I suck at ending my stories. This is because I feeling I could write so much more, and could go forever. But the… Read More Short Endings & Thoughts
As I’m working on Soulmates for Wattpad, I started thinking about something. I have been thinking about my passion project Red Dragons. When I was beginning to write the second book, I ended up writing about the absolute beginning. Before the events of the first book. I ended up scraping in favor of continuing the… Read More A little Hiccup
Computers The first computer in existence was the human mind. The first in our evolution, the first to be created with simple functions. We evolved to create tools and leave markings to indicate what we have learned and want to remember; this can easily be consider the first external hard-drive. Then came along better methods… Read More Article Draft: Old vs New
Xexiar 