As the clouds of memories starts to encloseThe fog of sorrow formFrom the depths of mindAnd heartWhere the valley of lost are remembered Whispers of past one wish to forgetThe cruelty of a bloodline one sharesWords of selfishness and worthlessAre spat at thyWhen in truthYou given your very soulTo a beast that holds no shame… Read More Poor But Not Broken
I’m ready to return home to NYC. Even people who are burnt out still manage to get through it all in nyc. I survived a call center for 2 months before I finally cracked. Yet I was willing to work for the nyc DMV if wasn’t for the temporary job placement of 3 months. I… Read More Health 079
I think I’m still not over my culture shock from moving from NYC to Grants Pass, OR. Especially when I dealt with my appointment last month in Portland, OR. I got excited about seeing skyscrapers and seeing a range of diversity of people. I got excited to see more than white ppl! Oh god! Do… Read More Health 078
A part of me wants to start something but the other part is calling it a waste of time. Like trying to wait for everything to line up but then when I get there will I still make excuses that it’s not perfect enough. One of those things of being a traumatized perfectionist. I can’t… Read More Trauma Recovery 003
Just wanna vent. As much as I want to buy a new mattress next month, it’ll be super unreasonable for me to do so. Sure, my current mattress is pretty sunken in, but I can manage a little longer. But that’s not why it’ll be unreasonable to get a new mattress. I currently won’t be… Read More Health 033
I already knew I was going to depend on someone to help me while healing from surgery but it’s so frustrating. Especially when it comes to chores that I’m very particular with. It’s more on the sense that my dishes aren’t being washed the way I like. For example there’s still pieces of food and… Read More Rant 029
After a night that had me spiraling to where my “unaliving” thoughts were strong, I’m slowly recovering today. Last night was so bad that I didn’t take my mood stabilizer (meds) because not only did I forget but also I have a very horrible history with medication. And today I slowly been unraveling a few… Read More Rant 019
Some reason I feel my first aid supplies is lacking. Along with over the counter medicine. … OTC: pain relief (off brand Tylenol), nasel relief (allergy nose pump), theraflu. First aid: anitiseptic cleaning spray, 3% hydrogen peroxide (spray), 70% isopropyl alcohol (rubbing alcohol), ice cold analgesic gel (menthol 1.25%)[like iceyhot but not], 50 spf sunscreen,… Read More Rant 018
You have left this worldLeaving me powerlessNo amount of begging or pleadingWill ever bring you back But what am I to doFor everywhere I turnTraces of you are still thereEvery taskIs not the same I can’t breathe or thinkWithout the crushing painStinking me lower to the ground I just want toRun from this realityAnd into… Read More Grief of a Love One
You can purchase this lovely piece over at: Gumroad Short story: After years of torment, she could no longer stand the world she came from. So, one night, she committed the most taboo act of her clan and left her body behind to wander aimlessly in the shadows.
Xexiar 