I left New York City due to multitude of reasons. Almost 20 years of no true vacation, dysfunctional family life, going straight through school and into the workforce without a break. My final mental break was during my call center job in 2019. Then Covid happened and I was stuck with my family with no… Read More Health 082
I think I’m still not over my culture shock from moving from NYC to Grants Pass, OR. Especially when I dealt with my appointment last month in Portland, OR. I got excited about seeing skyscrapers and seeing a range of diversity of people. I got excited to see more than white ppl! Oh god! Do… Read More Health 078
Today’s goal is to work on a few chapters. Maybe chapter 2 of my DBZ fanfic. Which is something I’m not posting until I have finished 5 chapters.If I’m lucky I might even be able to personally draft up a few mockup side stories for a project I want to do, but don’t know if… Read More Goals for the day and week
Found out the reason for my sleep and digestion issues I been having for the past few days. Along with why i was gaining weight, even when I have been sticking to my diet. I haven’t been drinking enough water. The day before yesterday, or at least the extreme AM of yesterday, I looked up… Read More Health 068
A part of me wants to start something but the other part is calling it a waste of time. Like trying to wait for everything to line up but then when I get there will I still make excuses that it’s not perfect enough. One of those things of being a traumatized perfectionist. I can’t… Read More Trauma Recovery 003
My horrible emotions this past few days has made me gain 5 lbs. I’m close to not caring the rest of the month. But I can’t do that to myself. I gotta at least go from 244 to 240 by December 31th. At least close to 240. I’m not mad or disappointed, because I know… Read More Health 039
Just wanna vent. As much as I want to buy a new mattress next month, it’ll be super unreasonable for me to do so. Sure, my current mattress is pretty sunken in, but I can manage a little longer. But that’s not why it’ll be unreasonable to get a new mattress. I currently won’t be… Read More Health 033
Did I eat more than 1500 calories today? Yes.Was I still in my calorie deficit? Also yes.Do I regret overdoing it? Nope.Dinner was filling and hit the spot. Sure, I went overboard with the chicken but fuck it. Besides, today re-enforced what I needed to do. From the fact I needed heavy meals so I… Read More Health 025
Just finished a 15 minute strength workout and I noticed something. When I was attempting to do some leg lifts, I felt out of control. Like it was easy to breathe and keep form, but something about it didn’t feel right. Almost like I was too relaxed and lacked focus. When dealing with weights and… Read More Physical Health 024
I definitely needed a rest day. Been having a rough cough, like the itchy throat dry cough one gets during allergy season. But you would think that me drinking tea, drinking water, and taking cough drops would help. Nope. So I really need to take a full on rest day, probably at least 2. And… Read More Health 022
Xexiar 