A part of me wants to start something but the other part is calling it a waste of time. Like trying to wait for everything to line up but then when I get there will I still make excuses that it’s not perfect enough. One of those things of being a traumatized perfectionist. I can’t… Read More Trauma Recovery 003
So… I did a thing. Especially since it will come in handy in the new year. Plus, I shifted my focus to next month’s budget so I can pretend I don’t have money. Really trying to do the “if I don’t know about it then it ain’t real” technique with my finances. Kinda like how… Read More Rant 033
Watching a video about overconsumption and made me wonder about kcup. Mainly like the single shots of coffee.Which led to the rabbit hole of would getting one of those machines worth it.The price alone is wild. Then the amount of coffee in one kcup is laughable. Not to mention the machine is huge and takes… Read More Rant 032
My horrible emotions this past few days has made me gain 5 lbs. I’m close to not caring the rest of the month. But I can’t do that to myself. I gotta at least go from 244 to 240 by December 31th. At least close to 240. I’m not mad or disappointed, because I know… Read More Health 039
Watching a video on professional attire for a job interview and it triggered a funny conversation I had with my sister before. Since she’s constantly telling me how I should wear color and have a very professional outfits. She would always tell me to stop wearing black. Even though, black is one of the most… Read More Trauma Recovery 002
For someone who talks a lot online, especially in written format, I am dogshit terrified of doing so in video format. For goodness sake, I have made accounts just to make vlog like post. But my dumb truck of a behind thinks I’m gonna fuck up because I’m not interesting or with how I don’t… Read More Rant 030
This is why I’m glad I was finally able to seek physical therapy for my back and pelvic floor. Since it help me give me a baseline on how I am and where I can improve. It’s one thing to try to learn all this on my own, and I’m very knowledgeable about a lot… Read More Health Rant 036
Just wanna vent. As much as I want to buy a new mattress next month, it’ll be super unreasonable for me to do so. Sure, my current mattress is pretty sunken in, but I can manage a little longer. But that’s not why it’ll be unreasonable to get a new mattress. I currently won’t be… Read More Health 033
I already knew I was going to depend on someone to help me while healing from surgery but it’s so frustrating. Especially when it comes to chores that I’m very particular with. It’s more on the sense that my dishes aren’t being washed the way I like. For example there’s still pieces of food and… Read More Rant 029
So… randomly I looked at the sizing of my shirts as I put them to wash, and I learned something amazing. My everyday shirts I wore for basically a year, big enough to fit comfortably but enough extra fabric it looked bigger than me, are all 3XL (and are men shirts). My Lane Bryant long… Read More Health 029
Xexiar 